Coraline: Christmas shopping

Coraline

Christmas Shopping

In Ashland, Oregon, USA, the date had reached December 12 2009. Christmas time was nearing and the people of Ashland were already flooding the shopping malls, trying to get to Christmas shopping done quickly, if possible. And amongst the hundreds upon hundreds of families that had come to shop were the Joneses…

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Coraline Jones walked down the aisle of the toy department of the store called 'Expensive Useless Junk'. Her parents, Mel and Charlie Jones was currently shopping for Christmas presents for the families' relatives in Germany. Mel told Coraline to go look at whatever she wanted her to her get for Christmas.

"Hmmm…" Coraline hummed to herself as she looked over the aisle at the countless selection of dolls and action figures. None of them interested her in the slightest, especially all the Barbie dolls that you could not turn your head without seeing. She was well passed the stage of dolls at eleven and there was nothing else that good available. "God's sakes, I know it's a recession but come on!"

It was just then that Coraline looked forward at gasped. At the end of the aisle, stacked in the form of a pyramid was…it. The perfect toy. She ran forward at breakneck speed and stopped to gape in awe.

It was the perfect toy, indeed…for Coraline. It took the appearance of a tuba and dangling out from the bell of each different coloured tuba was…a phone? It was a…

"'The Tuba-Phone!'!" Coraline read the name of the product which was imprinted on the sign overhead the pyramid in big bold white letters. "'It's not just a tuba…it's a phone!'!" In excitement, the blue haired girl snatched a purple Tuba-Phone and placed the leather strap over her to hold it properly. "Oh, this is so cool!"

"I know what you mean!" A voice spoke up, making Coraline jump a bit. She turned around to see Wybie Lovat, holding a lime green Tuba-Phone. "Every kid I've seen today has been talking about these."

"Wybie, what are you doing here?"

Wybie fiddled with a couple of the Tuba-Phone's valves, saying, "Grandma's visiting the doily shop. She said I could look around here while she was busy." He held up the Tuba-Phone. "Now aren't these things the best or what?"

"Oh, you bet they are." Coraline took in a deep breath and blew a low note on the Tuba-Phone. She looked back at him, asking, "So what are you doing for Christmas this year, Wybie?"

He frowned a bit and said, rubbing the back of his neck, "Oh, well…"

"We're having my relatives all the way from Germany over! I was thinking maybe you could come over as well!"

Wybie strummed his fingers together, "Well, Coraline, it's just that, uh…"

Coraline licked her lips and she put her hands together. "We're gonna have turkey, pudding, ice cream and--"

"Coraline!"

"What?"

"Coraline, I'm Jewish!"

She stopped and blinked for a moment. "Huh?"

Wybie nodded and explained, "Yeah, Coraline, I'm Jewish. I don't celebrate Christmas; I celebrate Hanukah."

Coraline paused for a moment, looking blank. Her lip quivered as a grin grew upon her face, until eventually, the girl burst out laughing, grabbing her sides. "Hahahahahahahahahahah! Y-you, you…hahahahahahahaha!"

He frowned. "Wow, thank you, Coraline. You're making fun of my religion, how politically correct of you." Wybie then flicked her off. "Hey, you know what? I think you're a German Nazi bitch. How's that feel?"

But Coraline continued to laugh regardless, "Hahahahahahahaha! N-no, Wybie, I-I-It's not that really! Hahahahaha!"

"Then what?"

"I get more presents than you! Hahahahaha!"

"What?!"

Coraline finally managed to calm herself down enough and told him, "Look, you get one present for eight nights. I got dozens of them in one morning! So you get screwed, Wybie while I get all the goodies!" She broke out in laughter once again.

Wybie was still not impressed. "Wow, you are THAT petty and arrogant, aren't you? Wow, just, wow!" When all he got was more mocking laughter, he frowned intensely. "Okay, you know what? Screw you! I'm going home!"

He stormed off, leaving Coraline to continue to laugh to herself for a couple more minutes. She eventually calmed herself down, with the odd giggle or two getting in her way and taking no notice to that Wybie was gone. "Oh, yeah, heh, heh, heh! That was fun…" she hoisted the Tuba-Phone up and walked. "I gotta show this to Mom and Dad…"

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Meanwhile, Mel and Charlie Jones were looking through the shelves for their gifts for Mel's side of the family all the way in Berlin, Germany.

Charlie took down a small porcelain penguin down from the shelf and held it up to Mel. "What do you think? You think Annamarie will like this?"

"Yeah, sure, she likes penguins." Mel looked through the shelves herself. "Hmm, wonder if Helga would--"

WWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Mel jumped at the sound of the low brass note and banged her head against the shelf. "OW! Son of a--" She turned around to see Coraline standing there, smiling and holding the Tuba-Phone. Mel frowned and looked the toy over disapprovingly, "Coraline…what the Hell is that thing?"

"It's the Tuba-Phone, Mom!"

"'Tuba-Phone'?" Charlie asked, looking confusedly at the toy.

"Yeah, you see, it's not just a tuba…" She blew another low note into the tuba, before then pulling out the phone through the bell. "…it's a phone! Isn't that cool!"

Mel rolled her eyes doubtfully and replied sarcastically, tapping the side of her own head, "Yeah, Coraline, many a time I've been talking on the phone and thinking to myself, "You know, if only I could be blowing a tuba during this conversation"!"

Coraline nodded, "I know, me too!" She held it up to her cheek and smiled adorably. "Baby wants toy!"

"Well, Baby doesn't get her presents until December 25th." Mel told her, taking the porcelain penguin for Annamarie and placing it in the shopping cart. "But you are NOT getting that piece of crap."

The blue-haired girl's mouth dropped. "W-w-what?"

"I am NOT buying you such a retarded toy. Forget it!"

"But…" Coraline's look of shock turned into a scowl and then, closing her eyes and balling her fists, she let out a high whine, annoying enough to make Mel and Charlie cringe. "MEEEHHHM!!!"

Mel shook the pain in her ears off and snapped, "That "but mehm" stuff doesn't work on me, Coraline Jones!"

Now Coraline was really pissed off. "I'll hold my breath, mother." She warned, sounding ever so serious.

"Oh, come on, Coraline," Charlie sighed exasperatedly, hitting his forehead with his hand. "Do you really NEED to make an episode out of this?"

But Coraline was not about to be negotiated with. She took in a deep breath and kept her mouth shut, standing up straight with her arms crossed. Her face slowly began to turn crimson.

"It isn't going to work, Coraline." Mel turned back to what she was doing, trying her best to ignore the child.

Coraline's face was now slowly turning a bluish tint. Charlie noticed this and said to Mel, sounding growingly concerned, "Uh, Mel, maybe you should just…"

"No, Charlie! I am not caving in just because she holds her breath!"

The girl was starting to twitch in place as her face grew bluer. She was seriously running out of oxygen. Mel began to take notice out of the corner of her eye and frowned. Biting her lip, she let out a grown of frustration. "Okay, alright! I promise I'll get you that stupid toy for Christmas! Now breath, for God's sake!" The next thing Mel knew, Coraline, who was now breathing, hugged onto her mother's waist.

"Thanks, Mom." Coraline smiled, rubbing her head against Mel's side. The mother smiled lightly and ran her fingers through her daughter's hair.

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"Okay…one…two…three, NOW!" Mel grunted as she and Charlie lifted the heavy bags and tossed them into the back of their Volkswagen car on the third floor of the parking deck. "Oh, God…" Mel put her hands on her back and groaned. "That really hurts my back!"

Meanwhile, Coraline was leaning lazily against the support pillar of the floor, eating a double scoop ice cream of chocolate and mint choc chip. She licked her lips, having now finished the ice cream (along with the cone) and was about to rejoin her parents at their car, when she nearly tripped over something on the concrete floor.

"What the-?" Coraline looked down to see someone familiar to her sitting there. "Rudy?"

Rudy Vulmer sat there on the ground, a dirty chequered blanket covering his legs and a ushanka over his head. In his hand was a tin can with a dollar sign on the front.

"Rudy, what the Hell are you doing?"

He responded, straightening up a bit, "Well, we're lacking in money for Christmas dinner this year, so Ma and Pa told me to go asking for charity."

"Wow, your family is on welfare and you guys still can't afford a Christmas dinner?" Coraline scoffed, looking down on her schoolmate. "You people really ARE poor!"

"I know, I know, I'm a "poor piece of crap", I know." Rudy groaned. He had to put up with being mocked for being poor enough already at school. He shook his charity can a bit to her. "Look, do you think you could, you know…?"

Coraline searched through her pocket and took out a ten dollar bill. "Oh, yeah…I get a pretty big allowance. Here you go…" She reached out to give it to Rudy, and the boy was about to take it when she snatched it right back. "Whoops! To slow!"

"Oh, come on, Coraline!"

"Okay, okay, I'm just joking." Coraline chuckled lightly and reached the bill out to him again, though only to take it back once more. "Oooooh, nearly had it, there!"

"Damn it, Coraline!"

The blue-haired girl then got a really wicked idea and took out a lighter from her pocket and lit it. She held the bill and the small flame close together and smirked at Rudy, "Eh?"

Coraline lit the end of the bill and Rudy watched in horror as the currency was slowly destroyed by the flame. When she was done, Coraline put out the lighter, waved the bill a bit to put out most of the flame and flicked the burnt piece of paper away carelessly.

"Well…" Coraline clapped her hands together after putting the lighter away. "…that was fun! That's ten dollars YOU'LL never see again, Rudy!"

"You BITCH!"

Still laughing, Coraline began to walk off before stopping to look at Rudy once again and remarking, "Oh, yeah, and by the way; maybe on Christmas we and the gang could go playing our Tuba-Phones together." She then faked gasped as she 'realised' something. "Ah, but that's right! You're family can't afford one. Then again, Tuba-Phone's are only $19.95, so maybe your mom can put it on layaway and make payments for a two to three years. Huahahahahahahaha!" With that Coraline walked off back to her family's car, throwing her head and laughing all the way.

Rudy yelled back furiously, "You're a freakin' degenerate even at CHRISTMAS, Coraline Jones!"

"I know I am!" she retorted haughtily.

As Coraline hopped into the back of her car, Mel asked her as they all buckled in and began to drive off, "Coraline, what were you doing back there?"

"Ah, my poor piece of crap friend, Rudy was asking for charity because his family can't afford even Christmas dinner."

"Did you give him anything?"

"Hell no, I took out a ten dollar bill and burned it right in front of him." Coraline responded nonchalantly.

"That's my little girl."